Moderator: You may start asking questions now.
Question: All cricket experts are unanimous in saying that lack of preparation for the England tour did India in. Do you agree with that ?
Srinivasan: Not at all. I completely disagree with that ! In fact I think BCCI should be lauded for the extensive planning and preparation it did for the tour. The Indian team's sponsors for the tour were decided about a year back. The revenue sharing model between ECB and BCCI was finalized well ahead of schedule. In fact not only for this tour, but in general BCCI has been very active in planning. The television broadcast rights for all the matches to be held in India till 2014 have already been auctioned. What else do you expect from BCCI?
(followed by a sigh and a slight shake of the head)
Question: Fitness was a major concern for India in the test series, which was exemplified by the way R.P Singh bowled in the Oval test. What do you have to say of that?
Srinivasan: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? By all accounts, R.P bowled fantastically. In fact we are planning to confer him the mohinder amarnath award for the most spectacular comeback. RP bowled 34 overs and gave only 118 runs - an economy of 3.47. Do you know how good that economy rate is ? For a T20 match that comes around 14 runs in 4 overs, which is match-winning.
(smiling and obviously pleased with his cricketing acumen)
Question: Experts are saying that IPL is the root cause for the pathetic state in which the Indian cricket finds itself now. What will you say to the critics of IPL?
Srinivasan: You guys blame IPL for every ill that infects cricket in the country. I personally think IPL is the best thing that has happened to Indian cricket.It has made me famous across the world; by owning Chennai super kings I have increased my net worth many-folds; I wield enormous influence on all the cricketing matters in the country and none of these things could have happened without the IPL.
(it took some time for people in the room to realize that Srinivasan was using the words 'Indian Cricket' and 'me/I' interchangeably ! )
Question:Many cricket experts and former players are lamenting the lack of importance given to Test cricket in India. How is the BCCI trying to set this right?
Srinivasan: You have raised a very valid point. It is indeed sad that youngsters are concentrating more on T20s and not giving much importance to Test cricket. It really saddens me when I see this. To tackle this, BCCI has come up with an innovative solution, which I believe will appeal to everyone - the players, the administrators and the businessmen - alike.
We have decided to rename T20 to Test. From now on, DLF IPL will be called DLF IPL Test championship and all T20 matches will be called Test matches. This way we will be able to maintain the primacy of Test cricket!!!
(No comments !)
Moderator : Okay, one last question please.
Question : There are conflict of interests everywhere in BCCI - people hold prominent positions in BCCI but also own IPL teams; commentators hired by the television channels work directly for the BCCI and so on. What have you decided to do in this case?
Moderator: Yes, any more questions ?
Question: As I was telling, conflict of interest in Indian cricket......
Moderator: Okay, so no more questions? Thank you everyone for attending the CITI-Moment-Of-Success press conference..
Disclaimer : Of course, the press conference described above is purely a product of my imagination and the facts / figures mentioned in the post may or may not be correct
Nice satire.
ReplyDeleteThanks TF :)
ReplyDelete